Reflections on 2009 so far...

We're already two months in to 2009, and I can't believe how quickly it's gone. I also can't believe how much has happened, and the number of things I've learned. I guess life-long learning really does exist...

I hate uncertainty

For several weeks in January, our company was struggling with the implementation of a new database. I had been spearheading the data conversion, a process that had straddled several months. Long story short, it wasn't everything we had imagined. We spent about a week flip-flopping between forging ahead with the new database, or backtracking to stay with the old one. Ultimately, due to various technical and licensing issues, the decision was made for us.

This period was incredibly stressful for me. Not knowing from day to day which system we were going to use was intolerable. It nearly brought me to a productivity standstill. Once the outcome - thought not necessarily ideal - was determined, I could relax and get back to work.

Lesson learned:

Find out ahead of time exactly what the implications of a given action are. And, find out if there is an option for changing the chosen course. Don't allow for uncertainty as a result of unexpected consequences.

I trust people too much.

I assume that 'professionals' and 'experts' in a given field know what they're doing. In February, this has applied to a) a countertop installer, and b) an accountant. In the first instance (detailed in my Queercents blog post), the work was being done for me - and done wrong. In the second instance, I let ignorance lead the way and assumed that "I can use this software even though I haven't used it in 8 years" meant she really could. I was mistaken.

Lessons learned (there are two):

1) Watch closely, or people will screw you - whether with malice or just through lack of effort. Nobu oversaw most of our kitchen installation, asked ton of questions, and watched every move the contractors made - and the job was done right. Me, I just sat back and let the guy do his job, and regretted it.

2) Ask LOTS of questions. In dealing with the accountant, I took too many things for granted. I thought I had got things covered, but I didn't focus on the most important details. I now know ask things like: "What version of the software have you used?", "When was the last time you used this software?" and "Did you do that on the job, or just in school?" The phrase 'familiar with' can mean a lot of different things. And, the DOS version of ACCPAC is not the same as the Windows version...

I suck at confrontation (or the anticipation of it)

When I had to call the installer to get him back in to fix the crooked countertop, I felt guilty. It was so hard for me to make that phone call. And when it wasn't certain when or if he was going to come back, waiting for him to return my call tied a knot in my stomach for most of the day. This refers back to my first point - I hate uncertainty - but I was also worried about having to argue my point or get into some sort of confrontation.

If one of the candidates employed by us doesn't work out, making the phone call to tell them what they have done wrong - addressing a performance issue or the like - is painful. I don't want to be the bad cop. Even if I'm angry at them for doing something stupid enough to get themselves fired, telling them that is really difficult.

Lessons learned (three this time!)

1) Don't apologise so much. Even when the mistakes aren't mine, I have a (typically Canadian?) tendency to say "Sorry". This is going to be a tough habit to break.

2) Don't let it be personal. The crooked countertop wasn't about me, or the installer - it was about a poorly done job. When I have to tell a candidate they were fired, it's not about them personally, it's about some action - or inaction - on their part. I have to focus on the issue, not the individual.

3) Keep a record of what was said. I'm usually a pretty good record keeper, especially when money is involved. However, what gets said during a conversation is often pretty subjective. I'm actually starting an Excel spreadsheet to keep track of conversations with customer service reps. (I know, I'm a total geek.)

I was feeling very broody today, and thought getting this stuff down on paper, so to speak, would help alleviate that a bit. Any feedback or insights from anyone? Anything you've learned from your experience in 2009? I trust March to be something entirely different!

Kitchen Renovation: 5 Lessons Learned

Our kitchen is nearly done! I've blogged about it as a guest writer on the Queercents website, and you can read my post here.

How we Age: Facebook Follies

Facebook is a funny thing.

A few weeks ago I was browsing through that list on Facebook of 'people you might know' - the friends of friends who likely circulated in the same circles as you, and who you may or may not have known, or even liked. Of course, some of these people I've never heard of; they are from different aspects of your friends' lives, ones whose paths you've never crossed.

But once in awhile you see a name that brings back memories, and reconnect with someone you never thought you'd encounter again. I saw one of those names - not from the distant past, but someone I'd lost touch with - and added them as a friend.

He accepted. It wasn't who I thought it was. Which is OK, just unexpected. A quick glance at his profile, and I realised my mistake. But, you know, he was someone I sort of knew. And, to be quite honest, I had a bit of a crush on him back in high school, back in the days before I knew what that meant, because of course at the time I hadn't quite acknowledged my gayness, but there you go.

But he didn't have a profile picture! The few pictures he had were not of him!

Until today. Oh, someone tagged him in a photo! I had to look...but then I was shocked. Was this the guy I had a crush on? Was this the guy...wait a minute, let me check the yearbook. Couldn't find him in the 1987 yearbook (yikes), but did find him in the 1989 yearbook! And he was really cute! 20 years later I can see what I found attractive in him. I had to spend a few minutes comparing the yearbook photo with the Facebook photo. And I sighed.

We all grow rounder, we lose our hair, we start to wrinkle, we don't look anything like our high school photos. But that's OK, too. I see a lot of people who look better now. Now that they're grown into themselves, learned who they really are, gained a sense of fashion, and become real people.

Before finding out in person, I've heard about weddings, births, separations, and couples getting together and breaking up (numerous times). I'm sure a few people have learned that I'm gay through Facebook alone. We can reveal as much or as little as we want about ourselves. Obviously, this guy had chosen not to post pictures of himself - someone else did it for him! And I wrote a blog about it.

Facebook is a funny thing.

2009 - No Resolutions, Just Some Goals

I skimmed very quickly through one personal finance book, and have sticky-tabbed my way through another. I'll review both books in upcoming blogs: Suze Orman's The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous & Broke and Smart Couples Finish Rich by David Bach. Did not like Orman's book at all; found Bach's writing (and, particularly, the fact that it was a Canadian Edition) to be just what I needed!

Now that businesses are opening again after the holidays, I've set out to figure out a few things: first, get a will sorted - we have a couple of self-produced ones, but I don't really trust them to ultimately do us good service; second, clear up our insurance coverage - currently, we have both life and critical illness insurance, but the premiums on the latter get pretty astronomical after the first 10 years, and I think I can do better investing of that cash myself; and, finally, to find us a financial adviser (or, at the very least, someone who can put us on the right track).

Another goal of mine is to complete an 8K run as part of the BMO Vancouver Marathon. Not much of a distance, but a significant aim for someone like me, who really isn't much of an athlete at all!

2009 will be a year of accomplishment, of setting and reaching goals, of exceeding my own expectations, and of getting on the path to success in as many aspects of my life as possible!

Hooray for 2009!

Boxing Day Review: The Richest Man in Babylon

A slim book, but packed full of timeless wisdom, The Richest Man in Babylon is an unexpected delight! It was an easy read, as I read through it in just a couple of hours. Written in the style of parables or fables, the King James-sounding prose (with lots of thee's and thou's) might put some readers off, but I found it rather quaint, and felt it added some personality to the story-telling.

What struck me the most is how the principles of Babylon, which was published in its original form in 1926(!), apply just as well in 2008 (or, very soon, 2009). I was skeptical at first, because a personal finance 'classic' isn't always what it's cracked up to be, but the message came through loud and clear. Principles of saving, debt-reduction, and hard work are well-articulated. From each story you can glean some wisdom, and most contemporary personal finance gurus, such as Dave Ramsey, pretty much say the same things in different words. I think I prefer the biblical language over, say, the language of the 1920s, which would probably feel more out-of-date than the 'ancient' language actually used in the book.

The Simple Dollar reviewed the book just about 2 years ago - you can read the review here. Because I really like Trent's summary of the book's key points, I won't bother rehashing them here. What I took away from Babylon were the following:

1) Saving 10% of everything you earn is key. The Wealthy Barber says this. Dave Ramsey says this. It's a pretty common theme throughout personal finance literature. No matter how hard you think it might be to sock away that 10%, it's truly the foundation for getting yourself on the right track. What you do with that 10% is a whole other topic, but the saving part is essential.

2) Live below your means. Another common sense but oft overlooked tenet of personal finance. Beyond the 10% savings, Babylon suggests living on 70% of what you earn, using the remaining 20% to pay off debt.

3) Procrastination is the enemy of success. I like this one. The story used to illustrate this point highlights the cost of missed opportunities. Thematically, the author strongly encourages that financial decisions be made only when you have a solid knowledge of where your money is going, and in consultation with people who know what they're talking about. But Babylon sums up the concept of seizing opportunity this way: Men of action are favoured by the Goddess of good luck. Simplistic, perhaps, but as procrastination is something I myself am subject to, it's something to think about!

Overall, The Richest Man in Babylon exceeded my expectations. I thought it would be dry, paternalistic, and outdated. I was wrong. And even if you get just one nugget of wisdom from its pages, it's worth a read.